Thursday, July 8, 2010
Thoughts of the views of marriage...
Yesterday was our 1 year wedding anniversary! I cant believe how quick the year went...and not to mention, Kale was home for the most of it!! I cant wait for the many other anniversaries that we share together!
It was a great day- went fishing (and catching!) with my parents on the boat for most of the day then met Dani (my best friend who was my Maid of Honor) to get some ice cream! The only thing missing...MY HUSBAND! He is out doing his 2nd-to-last training exercise before deployment...oh well, he is coming up at the end of the month so we are going to celebrate late- including eating out cake!
I was also looking back and thinking about the wedding, and the road that got us there...and I got to thinking...
I have long noticed that there is a divide in viewpoints regarding military relationships and civilian relationships but in the last few years I have realized that the divide seems huge- like one I could drive a semi-truck through. Its like two different worlds when talking about relationships...
Kale and I started dating in 2004, I graduated high school in 2006 and he joined the USMC and left for boot camp a month before my graduation...We got engaged in May 2007, right after my 19th birthday and depending on who I was talking to, my conversations were DRASTICALLY DIFFERENT!
Me: Im ENGAGED!
Military friend: ABOUT TIME!! I cant believe you didnt get married right when he graduated boot camp, yall have been together for a long time! Whens the wedding?
Me: Were gonna wait a while, were thinking Summer 2009 (2 years away)
Military friend: WHAT!!!! WHY!!!!!! Why would you wait?!?!
Me: Im ENGAGED
Civilian Friend: OMG? Really? Youre going to have a long engagement right? I mean your so young, whats the rush? Why dont you just enjoy being young? You havent thought about the wedding at all right?
Me: Were gonna wait a while, were thinking Summer 2009
Civilian friend: THAT IS SO SOON! YOULL ONLY BE 21! ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO BE SO YOUNG?
COMPLETELY DIFFERENT! In the military, a common motto is "hurry up and wait", I think it should be "hurry up, then hurry up again!"...Ask any military couple if they know someone who met and got married within less then 6 months and you will be hard pressed to find someone who DOESNT know at least a handle of people, if not themselves!
Some of my closest friends have been married longer then they knew each other before marriage, they thought Kale and I were crazy for not being married since we had been dating so long and were clearly headed toward marriage, their point was "If its going to happen, why wait?"
Now ask that civilian if they know people who meet and get married within 6 months, and that number that can list people drops WAY down! Its such a foreign concept, and that doesnt even factor in how most military get married young!
I dont think either "side" is right or wrong but it just shows how different of lifestyles become when one "marries the military"...
Now, of course since the views of when to get married are so different, you could imagine the difference when it comes to children! I can only imagine the different views we get when we expand our family from the "two sides"!
This ended up becoming a really random post but its something that I have been thinking about, especially since someone made the comment to me "How are you married, you look like you're in Kindergarten!"
So, to keep adding to the randomness of thoughts that this blog has become, enjoy some wedding photos!
This describes us...to the tee haha
and one of my all time favorite pictures of the night!